Network Marketing Prospecting and Sponsoring Lessons I Learned from an Embarrassing Moment

Network Marketing Prospecting Thanksgiving StoryThanksgiving for us, is always a time for stories and fun, and one of them that we had a great laugh over this weekend, reminded me of a few lessons that could totally apply to network marketing prospecting and sponsoring.

It’s one of my most embarrassing moments, but one that I hope you enjoy a little laugh over too.

Network Marketing Prospecting Secret #1: Share the real you and be willing to laugh at yourself!

I was newly engaged to my now husband of 15 years and I had decided to host Thanksgiving dinner.  I had seen my own mom, fix and prepare beautiful Thanksgiving feasts for 20 years, and I just knew I could impress my future mother in law and convince her of what a great wife I would be to the man we both loved so much.

Saying it was a disaster is an understatement!

The turkey was still frozen in the middle and wasn’t done until about 10:00 pm.  I didn’t know to take the bag of “guts” and the neck out of the turkey before I cooked it, so I baked it all in there with the stuffing.  I melted my plastic ice cube trays to the top of the stove.  I turned all the wooden handles to my hand-me-down pots and pans into charcoal because I mistakenly thought the drawer on the bottom of the stove was for storage, not a broiler.  I melted the rubber spatula into the gravy.  And to top it all off, while I was laughing so hard about everything that had happened, I accidentally farted right in front of her, my fiance, and everyone else in the family.

It was probably the best thing that I could have ever done.

While I my initial intention was to totally impress her, I ended up letting her see and know the “real” me.  A 20 year old girl who was clumsy in the kitchen, had a sense of humor and could laugh at herself, and who would do anything for her son.

We ended up having a very nice dinner, eating the side dishes and pie, and spent the night really talking and getting to know each other.  This weekend, 15 years after my embarrassing thanksgiving dinner, she told me again how much she loved my open-honesty and ability to laugh at myself.

Are you open and honest, and able to laugh at yourself in your network marketing prospecting conversations?

Network Marketing Prospecting and Sponsoring Secret #2: Don’t try to impress or convince anyone!

I’ve had network marketing prospecting conversations that went like my first thanksgiving dinner did.  I’ve said practically every dumb thing possible around network marketing, and painted myself into many a corner answering objections and questions, but the one thing I’ve learned is that when I set out to impress someone or convince them, I’m doomed to fail.

I know when I first got started in network marketing I didn’t like prospecting and recruiting because I didn’t feel like I had achieved success yet.  I didn’t feel like I knew enough, and I was scared to talk to people because I might not say the right things and end up looking like an idiot.

But my upline reminded me on many occasion, that every person at the top of the company was sponsored by someone who was at one point, nervous to talk to people about the business.  Every success story started out right where I was, without a team, without all the answers, and scared they would say the wrong things.

When it comes to network marketing prospecting and sponsoring, don’t take yourself seriously but do take what you do seriously. You are dealing with people’s dreams, their money, and their time in this business.  There really isn’t a bigger responsibility you can be given, if you ask me.  And the network marketers who are out there, trying to be someone they are not, faking their success, and trying to impress make a bad name for us all.

Are you comfortable with who you are and where you are in your business?  Do you try to impress or convince others when you are prospecting in your network marketing business?

Network Marketing Prospecting and Sponsoring Secret #3: Lead with your heart and focus on them!

When I lead with my heart, focusing on what’s best for the person I’m talking to, answering honestly the things I know, and the things I don’t, and mostly letting the “real me” shine through, my sponsoring success is much higher.  I’ve learned that trying to convince someone into the business is a mistake that I’ll end up paying for with hurt relationships and a lot of work dragging someone along.

Network marketing prospecting success boils down to the type of relationship you have with the person you’re talking to.  That’s easier to achieve when you follow the 5 pillars of kindness in your network marketing prospecting activities and make sure you focus on them.

Network marketing prospecting and sponsoring questions to ask yourself:

Do they believe you? Do they trust you?  Can they relate to you?  Do they feel like you understand them, their problems, and their needs?  Do they feel like you can help them achieve success?  Do they believe that you are committed to helping them achieve success? Do they feel like they can do it?

When you make it about them and they know that you are fun, and you can laugh at yourself and help them feel more comfortable about themselves as well, you’ll build a better relationship.  Follow the 5 pillars of kindness to

Do you lead with your heart and make your prospecting conversations about the person you’re hoping to sponsor?

Network Marketing Prospecting and Sponsoring Secret #4: Sponsor your weaknesses!

As is turns out, my husband is a fantastic cook and cooking for him is something he totally enjoys.   I’ve been able to leverage his strength in that area for our whole marriage, while he’s able to enjoy my strengths in other areas.

Don’t try to fake-your weaknesses.  Be the best you can possibly be in the areas where you’ve been gifted and let others do the same.  Always be yourself in your network marketing prospecting conversations and let people know what you’re really all about, the things you’re great at, and even the things you’re not so great at.

One of the greatest things in network marketing is the ability to sponsor our weaknesses.  By sponsoring people who have strengths in areas where we do not, we can all benefit.   It’s a really neat environment to create symbiotic relationships because we can all use our strengths and achieve more as a team than we could by ourselves.

Do you try to uncover strengths in others in the areas where you are weak in your network marketing prospecting and sponsoring conversations?

My attorney sent me a Thanksgiving card this week with a message that I believe ties this all together:

There is a destiny that makes us brothers
no one goes his way alone,
All that we send into the lives of others
comes back into our own.

So, please share with me your thoughts in the comments below.  You are on a dofollow blog and you will receive some link-love from me when you do.  And please share this post with others on facebook and twitter if you enjoyed it.

And, above all, please remember to keep your sense of humor, laugh at yourself, share the real you.  Don’t try to convince and impress anyone, keep the conversations about your prospects and their needs.  And finally, sponsor your weakness in your network marketing prospecting and recruiting conversations!


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  1. LOL Heather,

    I loved your Thanksgiving story.

    I can relate to a lot of what you shared. Laughing at yourself sure makes things more fun, and easier to deal with.

    It’s true too, if you try too hard when prospecting they can tell! Just have to relax and be ourselves, and if they connect with the real us, that’s wonderful! If not, that’s okay too because we are building a team, and we need to like one another. 😉

    Great story, message and post. Thanks Heather.


    • Heather C Stephens says:

      Hi Susanna!

      I’m glad you liked the story…I had one of those, “what did I do?” feelings after I clicked publish, but then I thought “oh well, why not?” LOL

      You really make a great point about the people who don’t like us for who we are, not being a match for us in our business. I’ve certainly had people who I didn’t mix with very well and neither one of us ever felt satisfied with each other. It’s not that we didn’t like each other, but we came from such varied viewpoints that it was hard to anticipate each others’ needs.

      I love it when I click with someone and know that we’re going to be great working together.

      Thanks so much for your comment!

      • Oh I’ve had one of those moments with a couple of my posts too… Wondering if I shared a little too much. lol

        No, this was great. Thanks Heather!

  2. Hi Heather,

    Loved your Thanksgiving story! I laughed a great deal I will tell you…

    Laughing and being happy is the most important ingredient for success because it allows us to vibrate at a much higher frequency which means we attract more of what we want without any effort.

    You are so right, people want to know that we are real so that they can relax and be real too.

    With regards to not trying to impress anyone – I never forget a long time ago, a prospect saying to me that he was very impressed with my business presentation but that there was no way he could join me because he would never be able to do presentations like the one I had just done.

    No matter how much I tired to convince him otherwise it made no difference. That was the last time I ever made that mistake. 🙂


    • Heather C Stephens says:

      Hi Marcus,

      Thanks so much for laughing with me! You’re right, laughing does help us to vibrate at a higher frequency and even forgetting the benefits of all of that vibration law of attraction stuff, it just feels good and is fun!

      I’m sure you’re a pro at your presenting. Your interview this past week was fantastic.

      I have someone way-way up in my upline who still holds note cards when she presents in front of a crowd because it helps the people watching her think that they could do that too. 🙂 I’m sure after 100’s of presentations she could do it in pig-Latin backwards and still be compelling, but it’s all about making it look easy enough for someone new, right?

      Thanks so much for your comment and your connection on Facebook. I had fun and really appreciate you!


  3. Oh my gosh Heather, I did the same thing the first time I made a turkey as a newlywed. It makes me laugh every time I think about it.

    So yes, we need to learn to laugh at ourselves. Sometimes we take ourselves too seriously and that’s really not healthy.

    BTW, I love your Attorney’s card …very nice!

    • Heather C Stephens says:

      Hi Liz!

      That makes me feel better! I’m in a family of fantastic cooks and 2 professional chefs and sometimes I feel like I’m the only one cooking can ever be challenging for! 🙂

      I’m glad you liked the post and the message from my attorney. I liked the card too.

      Thanks for your comment!

  4. Hello Heather,

    I love to read your blogs especially the first one which is the thanksgiving story.. It really made me laugh… But then I’m glad that it still end up great.. All the network marketing prospecting and sponsoring secret were right especially the 3rd one which is , we need to lead with our heart and focus to them. You need to show that you are trustworthy, you understand or you can relate to their situation and you are willing to help them. In that way, you can gain their trust. Thanks to your post and have a great day Heather..

    • Heather C Stephens says:

      Hi Shey,

      Thanks for the comment. I’m glad you enjoyed my Thanksgiving story! 🙂

      I know that when I’m leading with my heart and focused on others there is a feeling that comes with that; a sound to my voice or something that makes the conversation work effortlessly instead.

      Have a great weekend, Shey. Thanks again for commenting!

  5. Lol Heather…thanks for sharing the “real” you with all of us in the cyber world!!! I laughed & laughed & laughed & loved every moment of it!! You know, laughter is the best medicine plus, they also say that for every belly laugh you put out you burn 12 calories!! My children have asked me why I’m not thin then???? Hmmmmm!!!lol

    I have to say I love cooking & so I felt sorry for you on your Thanksgiving Dinner but hey we live & learn & experience IS the best teacher!! But admire you for laughing at yourself & making “lemonade” when life dealt you “lemons”!!

    Thanks again for sharing Heather!! You are so amazing & I love watching for your blogs!!

    Love, Karlene

    • Heather C Stephens says:

      HI Karlene!

      Glad I made you laugh with a bonus of 12 calories burned for every belly laugh! Woo-hoo!

      I don’t like using the word, but honestly I HATE cooking. It’s nothing but troubles and mess for me and when I consider how much food I ruin (like the spaghetti noodles a few weeks ago that didn’t bend) it is probably cheaper to eat out! 🙂

      Thankfully I married an amazing cook and since I love to eat, that’s worked out okay for us.

      Thanks for the tip. Now I have a goal to shoot for…since exercise is out of the question until my back get’s better, I try to belly laugh 100 times a day!

      I’m so not amazing, I’m just me.

      Appreciate you Karlene,


  6. This is not the advice you normally hear, but they are so effective. Laughing and being a real person make people feel comfortable around you and trust you more.

    • Heather Stephens says:

      Hi Dave,

      Thanks for the comment! There are so many magical things about laughter. It is a common bond that we all share and a genuine laugh makes everyone feel comfortable no matter what nationality or language. 🙂

      Happy New Year!

  7. Interesting post Heather,

    I noticed one thing in your blog that is in your all post have some massage and that’s why I am your big fan. Every day I read your one post and now I am addicted for your blog. 🙂

    This post is really true, if you work with happy mood definitely your interest for work is increase and you can give your best efforts in your work.

    I think the ultimate words for this post is be happy, be straightforward, and be clear for ultimate aim.

    Very Very Nice Post, 🙂

  8. Thanks for a good laugh, Heather. Just what I needed! 😀

    You’re very good with sharing your personal stories.

    Yep, there is a marketing lesson to be learned. The key is to be yourself.

    We all have strengths and weaknesses. We can’t be good at everything. When you have team members with different traits, you can help each other to achieve your mutual goals.

    Thanks for sharing this with us, Heather.

    All the best,

  9. Great tips…I agree, it’s always, always, always, about helping others if you want to succeed in networking. Don’t over hype or act cocky like you mention either. I’ve seen this doom many of my friends.



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